hard habit to break

I am a nocturnal mammal and it’s always been my habit to do more things and to feel more alive and awake during the evening (especially in the wee hours of the morning). Name it, I can do heavy stuff during the evening like washing clothes, cleaning and rearranging the furnitures in our house, writing/editing a six-page book review (or just any cerebral activity to compensate for my boring day in the office), or internet surfing from 9pm until 4am.  There were many times that I went straight to work without any sleep because of a lonesome activity that I did that stretched from evening until the following day.  I know it’s not a good lifestyle but I kept doing it over and over again. Involuntarily.

For a nocturnal mammal like me, waking up early is the hardest thing to do.  For twelve years as a working person, in every company I’ve ever worked for, I cannot recall if there was a time that I had a perfect attendance or without any tardiness.  But I do can say outright, out loud that being late has always been my perennial problem.

Though I’m a nocturnal, I don’t feel good being late because of its accompanying inconveniences — the rays of the sun tend to hurt at mid-morning, traffic is more terrible, people are in a haste and grumpy because they’re also late, transportation expenses tend to increase because of taking a taxi just so you could reach your destination fast, hoping against hope that you can still be on time. In short, it feels like I am messing up my life!  Somebody once asked me what is it that I am still desiring for at this stage of my life.  I said two things:  Financial independence and contentment.  Recalling that question at this moment I think I have to add “punctuality” into that list.

To change my life for the better, though no one has told me so and just what I thought is best for me, I will report to work at 7 o’clock in the morning STARTING TOMORROW, which turns out to be the second to the last day of August.

I mean it.  This is a life-or-death situation.


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